SwiMP3 Surf 256 MB

Surfers: Is the sound of the waves beginning to pall? Strap the cleverly named SwiMP3 (do you see?) to your arm and go surfin’ in the USA. Or Truro, if money’s tight. If you have no money at all the 3m underwater survival rate on this player also means that bath time can be to the blissful sounds of Belle and Sebastian.

Now granted, the 256MB capacity is so low you almost feel embarrassed for it and with its ugly, outsized, unresponsive buttons, the SwiMP3 is far from sexy. The circular shape looks more like a child’s watch than an MP3 player.

The terrifyingly flanged headphones- we swear we felt them touching the brain- are by far the worst we’ve tested straight from the box. With so much echo, lord knows what they’d sound like in the ocean.

Battery life is also pretty poor. You’ll get 10 hour playback, but compared to other players on the market that can last for up to 30 hours such as the Samsung T10 this is pretty poultry.

But hey, how may other players cam survive up to 3m underwater? Exactly.